My Community Garden. (I)

I am having such a blast this spring

filling my little house and every spare corner of rocky yard with pots full of life and green.

 My four different kinds of basil. I can't get enough dude. There's more inside, too.

It's such a cliche, especially a Pacific Northwest cliche, and especially a Christian-20-something-social-justice-ish-girl-in-Birkenstocks cliche...

but growing things myself, even just my tiny little bits,

has been so exciting, inspiring, and life-giving.

And picturing the people I love,

some close and some (too!!!) far,

doing that too,

working with their hands in the soil and coaxing life out of seeds and eating flavors they watered and getting joy from flowers they've nurtured into bloom...

makes me feel extra connected to them and extra life-is-good happy.

So.

I present. Emily's Community Garden. Part ONE, because I KNOW I'm getting MORE PICTURES FROM PEOPLE. :-D

Kelly sent me pictures of their beautiful garden in Maryland...

especially impressive considering she is 9 months pregnant! Go Alec and Kelly!!

This year they're growing tomatoes, jalapeno peppers, green beans, spaghetti squash, cucumbers, rosemary, basil, and mint. Baby Pax is going to be eating so well!!!

Amy and James just bought their first home in San Diego... so excited for them!! They already made this beautiful plot. (I get to go visit soon!)

Claire is brightening her Washington D.C. house with this potted loveliness.

In North Carolina, Tim and Ash and her parents are rocking OUT a garden, which is its whole own story. I will put more pics of it up later, but here is one to start. This entire structure is new this season, and it's been so fun to talk to her about it and hear how excited they are to be enjoying the earth this new way.

I love this picture from Marty... He and his dad planted this tree together in Texas!

In his email he wrote, "Gonna grow up to 80ft in the next couple decades! Hopefully will provide ample shade for (hopefully) my future brood of kiddos." I love that.

Sarah has two gardens in D.C.- a big community one and this front-yard kitchen herb garden...

...in which she is currently growing parsley, cilantro, sorrel, tarragon, rosemary, oregano, thyme, peppermint, lemon balm, mint, lavender, basil and nasturtiums.

Underachiever.

She sent this picture of the "results" of her community garden:

It grows mustard greens, Red Russian kale, turnip greens, and apparently diamond rings.

0:-)

Miss Rach and her crazy happy self on her Arkansas farm. For real. Girlfriend is so happy every time I talk to her- I love seeing her English major mind thriving in the dirt and the green.

She, her brother Peter, and three friends are loving living on two acres and growing (in this picture): potatoes, herbs, lettuces, kale, cabbage, arugula, a few early tomato and pepper plants, onions, and garlic.

Beautiful girl and Rockefeller the rockstar dog!

My sweet mom in Maryland is doing her usual plot of gorgeous flowers full of color... I'm leaving this photo uncropped to show that she is also enjoying the weather by kayaking. Of course. Crazy lady.

Nate is growing spinach, a few beets, lettuce, and tomatoes in Durham. He told me he had a salad from his garden the day he sent the pic. Nice!

Here is some Caleb cuteness in Michigan!! Hans and Lindsay just moved into their new house last week!! She wrote that they were excited to find some things already growing for them when they got there.

Locally... I love getting to see these Oregon gardens in person often.

Bryan, Leah, Wellington and baby Pearl are growing a gorgeous one just down the street from me. Welly as you can see is quite the gardener. Here he is helping start their tomatoes, peppers, lettuce, peas, carrots, cucumbers, and beans.

What a helper!

Brandon and Korie's BEAUTIFUL backyard was a huge factor in my deciding to plant flowers this year. So lovely.

I'm hoping their gardeners (and firefighters, slas, Mr. and Mrs. Claus) will come over and help me with mine, too.

Check out these garden models.

Friends, thank you for sharing the Life you are cultivating with me.

I love your flowers, your food, your babies, your dogs,

and trying to know what I can about pieces of joy in your days,

no matter how near or far we are.

.if wendell berry sent text messages.

from Rach:

"I'm collecting pretty leaves on the quad. Oh hey..."

me: "That makes me so happy. I miss youuu."

"Right back at ya. Today is a day where everything seems a miracle. The world is so full! The spoon is too big. How does this happen??"

Daybook: Aug 8

I love reading Elizabeth Foss's beautiful blog and I enjoy the "daybook" entries she does weekly. I thought I'd copy for the day, if for no other reason than to reflect a bit and have to look back on... Most of the prompts are straight from hers and some I added.

Outside My Window

The Wheaton train station and the ever-familiar sight of the street next to Caribou. Getting a window table here is one of my favorite things and I have spent more hours at them over the last four years than I could ever count.

I am Listening to

At the moment, just coffee shop talk drifting by. A few minutes ago, it was Deb Talan on my iPod.

I am Wearing

Black tank top, jean shorts, Tevas which thankfully I just found under my bed.

I am So Grateful for

• A wonderful catch-up breakfast with Sarah yesterday, passing through Chicago on her cross-country road trip.
  

• God being greater than my emotional ups and downs. It is easy in these days for me to think that I will always be such a victim to moods, tears, lack of energy, and I am grateful that God is stabler than me, faithful to me when I am unstable, and that "how I feel is not who I am".

I'm Pondering

Friendship. How grateful I am for it, what makes some work, its place in the post-graduate life, how to pursue it in a non-selfish, God-honoring, and healthy way.

I am Reading

I am in the middle of like eight things at the moment. I think I really need to structure in some committed reading time daily or at least weekly to make sure I am a) reading and b) finishing things. Over the last month, it's included the awesome biography There Is No Me Without You (about the AIDS crisis in Ethiopia and the importance of adoption), Loves Me Loves Me Not which is so thought-provoking and helps me love God more, and the audiobook version of Walk Two Moons, an old childhood favorite which has all the amazing deep character development and life truths of the BEST children's lit. I don't know if I'll ever love adult fiction as much as children's.

I am Thinking

See "pondering". Also about how I'm annoyed at myself for being so emotional. And about how I want to go into this work week rested, with a good attitude, ready to lesson plan creatively and with energy and truly put heart and joy into loving these kids and families as much as they deserve to be loved and served.

I am Creating

I've spent the last couple of hours working on a long encouragement letter to someone who completely deserves it. Also I'm trying to make my bedroom look pretty... more framed pictures (of people I love!), and I lost the quilt covers in favor of plain white duvets.

I am Missing
Being able to make spontaneous errand runs, hang-outs, dinners with Rachael (sob!!). I wanted to go to Target today and it hit me for the first time for REAL that she's really not here. She left for her amazing organic farm adventure this week. Matt, preemptively... he left for his amazing DC adventure today.

On my iPod

My playlist at the moment includes Steve Slagg, Shane & Shane, Rosie Thomas, and Over the Rhine.

Towards Being Faithful In This Time

I know that walking or being in some form of action makes it easier for me to pray, and I've fought against that lately because I'm lazy and it's more convenient to be able to pray sitting on my couch in my house for half an hour before I leave for work than having to do something (plus it's been too hot to walk). But last night I gave up and admitted that's what I need, and drove to campus and just walked around for an hour talking with God about multiple things. It was wonderful. I'm going to try to do the exact same thing multiple times this week. It works, and if something works for prayer, we should keep doing it, yeah?

One Thing I Love About My Job Right Now

Feeling like I can actually make a difference in a few of the families' lives. Two-year-old giggles. Praying for the families. Speaking Spanish. Whoops, that was more than one.

One Thing I Love About My Living Situation Right Now

Well, it's quiet because my roommates are away. I miss them. (Kendra wrote an interesting description of our living situation here :-)). I love the garden in the backyard, the fact that everyone thinks the house is adorable, and all the natural light.

One Thing I Love About Wheaton Life Right Now

Caribou :-)

One Thing I Love About My Church Right Now

Um, everything. OK... today there was violin and cello during worship. And we took Communion. And I saw a favorite professor and I'm having dinner at her house next week. And I love my church.

I am Hoping and Praying

To have a good and joyful and hard-working attitude this week.

From the Kitchen

I made artichoke-chicken for dinner on Friday when the Hiltibran clan and Steve came over (which was so so fun). A super simple Trader Joe's recipe. Yum.

One of my Favorite Things

Friends.

A Few Plans for the Rest of the Week

Work, trying to pray, a sleepover with sweet Christine and hopefully meeting up with miss Mary Gallagher... and it's my birthday!

A Couple Picture Thoughts:

• My sweet roommates- they like each other :-) On our new beautiful deck!
• And me with my wonderful friends Christine and Meghan at a really fun hang-out at Meg and Josh's apartment last week. Meghan and Josh are rocking newlywed life by having us all over a lot :-). I love it. It's been a wonderful part of summer.

Paul said to Petey, You gotta rock yourself a little harder.

A sweet best friend "felt compelled" to spend her lunch hour yesterday in one of the chapels on Wheaton's campus, praying for me and my family.
(No words for how much that means.)
She shared this verse from her time with me:

"Lord, through all the generations
You have been our home."
(Psalm 90:1)

A favorite.

.community: mine.

choked up reading Mark this morning.

And they came, bringing to Him a paralytic carried by four of them.
And when they could not get near Him because of the crowd,
they removed the roof above Him,
and when they had made an opening,
they let down the bed on which the paralytic lay.
And when Jesus saw their faith,
He said to the paralytic, "Son, your sins are forgiven."
ch 2, vs. 3-5

That story felt familiar.

:grateful.

Friends Are Great.

Reason Million and Twelve to LOVEEEEE Being Friends With Rachael Schaffner:

She texts me to go find her at work (she graduated last year and works for the Wheaton library).

When I do, she has at her desk waiting for me a sparkly pink princess crown and a sweet and encouraging note... written on a card which reads, "Kiss Me and Carry On".

It gives me extra brain power to finish my independent study...

I shall, woman, I shall.

Best last-day-of-finals present EVER.

(PS, these shelves seem familiar... last finals week distraction blog post I'll ever write, at least til grad school!)

I gave her the kiss, so now I suppose I need to carry on...

10 joys of the moment

-long conversations where one or both people are figuring important things out in safe presence

-waking up and talking with my roommate while we're both still in bed

-peaceful, long-for-me (aka like 20-25 min) runs on the prairie path (especially now that i can actually breathe all the way through, yay for being on week 5 of my training! not for anything impressive)

-blossoming trees EVERYWHERE

-sitting reading alone on our back deck

-coffee dates with tamara

-rachael tuesday afternoons

-lists and piles of good books i can't wait to read, because-in-two-weeks-i'll-never-have-homework-again-and-can-read-for-pleasure-every-evening-oh-my-goodness...

-emails from Bolivia

-people speaking wisdom to me...

Rach said it better.

My great friend Rachael wrote a post a few days ago that I identified with to my bones. She said I could guest post it here so I am :-)

"...I feel like maybe these past few weeks have been a Slash Fail for me. Not in a- if you were Catholic you'd be saying Hail Mary's for a month- sort of way. Just... a slash fail. In some ways I want to take back the last few weeks, make them less messy, less spastic, less loud. I regret some things said and some things done. I regret not regretting some of it. I've been distracted and detached, more interested in finding momentary satisfaction than living the life I've been called to. I've failed to listen to the Lord well, failed to stop moving long enough to remember that the Lord offers his healing, enclosing hands. Oh he break bones and bruise hearts and-- as Sufjan says- " he takes and he takes and he takes." But those hands also and always offer purpose and direction, identity and strength for fulfilling what we are called to.

So. Slash Fail. I'm repentant and saddened yet simultaneously encouraged by the Lord's promises in the midst of my incompetence. I'm somewhat disgusted with myself but also laughing at my youth, my inexperience, my ridiculous desire for control, and the ever present grace of my Lord and Father. John Stott said he pictures God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit smothering laughter at our mishaps, giggling at our futile attempts to fix things in the same way we might laugh at the toddler who stubbornly tries to fit a square block into a round hole. But, even as He/They smile at us, strong hands are there to redirect the block and soothe our frustrated, stubborn hearts."

Amen. To all of it.

(Thanks for the words, babe.)

Thanks for the grace, Lord.

but if you try sometimes you just might find you get what you need.

We received the news on Thursday that my mother has breast cancer.

She is beautiful.

Please be praying for her,
and our family.

Yesterday:
Me: So Mom, how are you feeling?
Mom: Well honey, quite frantic. This snow is MELTING and I still need to get more skiing in...

...So she spent the weekend at a cabin cross-country skiing with some of her best buds.
Quite characteristic.
Oh I adore her.

Her friends are wonderful.

It has been a few days of emotional intensity, needless to say. I have the best friends in the whole world ever. WHOLE world EVER. WHOLE WORLD EVER. My friends are. The best. In it.

They have prayed prayed prayed. Sat with me when I cried. Done a lot of that, actually. This past year has been such a ridiculous experience of learning the value of freakin' PRESENCE. Sit And Be With People. Just do it. It's so much more helpful than like, anything else. It was me learning to do that with my girls in Bolivia, with my host family- first because it was the only thing I actually had the lingual ability to do, but then because I realized it was way more precious and important than anything else I could pretend to be able to do. And these last couple of months, it has been TEARS OF GRATITUDE for those people who are willing to do that with me. To sit and just be with me, be with my questions and tears and theological freak-out-moments and restructuring as I have come back from this crazy Bolivia thing. And now, they are sitting with me and my family as we start this new journey.

In addition to the sitting...
friends have also paused an all-HNGR group meeting to pray for my mom and our family, scooped me out to dinner, ignored my ignoring of their phone calls to show up and cuddle with me, rolled their eyes at my insistence that I was fine to handle the cafeteria and brought food to my house, rearranged spring break plans to get me home for longer, held my hand, rubbed my back, cried too, not believed me when I said I was okay, shared their own stories, been willing to drop everything to listen and be. Did I mention prayed for my mom?

Oh, and it's also been
Rachael, after giving me a huge hug and asking concerned questions,
sending me this email:
"Do you read My Life is Average ever? Read these...

Today, I got a new orange kitten. I live on the second story of my apartment building, which has a balcony. I felt it appropriate to blast The Lion King music and re-enact the scene where Simba is held up on the cliff. People gathered, watched, and then applauded. It was epic. MLIA...
Today I was listening to the radio, and they were asking little kids what they wanted for Christmas. All the answers were expected until one little girl. When she was asked, she said she wanted a little brother named french fries. Me too little girl, me too. MLIA

I love you babe,
Rach"

In my opinion, possibly the best response to finding out your friend's mom has cancer... ever.

...I like my parents all the time, but right now I am overwhelmed with gratitude as I think about how much I would never want anyone else.

...And how blessed all of us are with the support and love by which we are surrounded.

...And... not much more to say at the moment.

Thanks for loving us.

(Um, on a separate note, I've been really wanting to do a post about how great the music I've been listening to this semester is. Check it- current playlist contains: Owl City (Fireflies and Hot Air Balloon), Taylor Swift (All, but especially White Horse, Tim McGraw, Stay Beautiful... Taylor Swift really just makes EVERYTHING better, for the record), Deb Talan (All, but especially Big Strong Girl, Kinder Columbus, Thanksgiving, Tenderness, How Will He Find Me, The Gladdest Thing), Joshua Radin (All, but especially No Envy No Fear, Paperweight, These Photographs, What If You, Winter, Today... ok... really, just all), Train (Hey Soul Sister), and Glee.
I know right- Best. Playlist. Evvv-errr, be jealous. Or just copy me like you know you want to.)

To end: Some more MLIA's I found and loved.

Today I walked into my kitchen where my dad was helping my little brother with his math homework. While I was getting my glass of milk I noticed that my dad was holding a nerf gun and then proceded to watch him shoot my brother with it everytime he got a wrong answer. MLIA

Today, I was outside of Home Depot, when I almost got knocked over by an old man riding by on one of those orange cart things. His grandson ran up to me, apologized for his grandfather's bad behavior, then proceeded to run after his grandfather saying, "Alright Grandpa, if you get us kicked out of one more store, I'm telling Grandma." MLIA

Today, my twin brother tried to convince me that he doesn't exist and that I'm actually schizophrenic. He then refused to open doors because ghosts can't open doors. We're almost 18. MLIA

The other day I was in the car with my dad. The song Single Ladies by Beyonce came on and he started singing along. But he was singing, I'm a single A! I'm a single A! I'm a triple A! I'm a double A! He said he loved the battery song. I didn't even bother to tell him. I love my dad. MLIA

Currently listening to: Glee, "You Can't Always Get What You Want". ...But we get what we need.

Quote of the Day #3

"La-la-la, I'M Emily GOLDberg! And me and the Holy Spirit are just like so totally BFF that He just does my homework for me!!"

-Gabe Richarde, imitating me after Rach told him she was on her way to hang out with me on Monday night.


Me and the Holy Spirit are absolutely just like so totally BFF.

Unfortunately for my finals week, He has yet to agree to do my homework for me.

Yesss

Today I heard this precious sentence from the mouth of my dear friend Rachael:

"The other night I skipped CareerFest, went to Caribou, and read the Henri Nouwen book you loaned me."

...

This pretty much represents everything I hope to inspire at Wheaton College.