Works for Me Wednesday: Prayer Books

I became a Christian at 13. The very first thing that made me think maybe I wanted to give Jesus a try was hearing the people at the Bible study I visited pray- so spontaneous and intimate, as if they really had a relationship with the person they were speaking with.

I then spent my high school career in the greatest church in the whole entire world (in my unbiased opinion). There I was taught that talking to God can and should be as easy as talking to a friend. Tell Him about the friend who snubbed you at lunch and the boy you have a crush on, ask Him to help you know Him better. Use whatever words you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be formal or scary, Jesus knows our hearts and wants us to come as we are.

So that is wonderful, but somehow along the way I got the idea that praying any sort of pre-written prayer "didn't really count". Praying to me was having a conversation, and how could you have a natural conversation if someone else wrote it?! Didn't that mean that it wasn't really heartfelt, or made God sort of distant and removed? Yet tons of my friends at college came from Anglican traditions and clearly had thriving relationships with God using lots of pre-typed, daily-ordered prayers. I gradually gave it a try, and in the past few years I have discovered how much I LOVE using pre-written prayers (prayer books, hymns, daily office, etc.) to pray and connect with God.

Here are a few of the main benefits pre-written prayers have had for my spiritual life:

1) Relief From Anxiety.
This might be the biggest difference using prayer books has really made for me. I am super anxious girl. While I wholeheartedly believe everything I just wrote about coming to Jesus as we are and being able to speak with Him openly and honestly, it is often not that easy for me. Much of praying in high school (OK, and now!) for me was characterized by fear, worry that I'm saying the "wrong thing", or just being totally paralyzed and unsure of how to start. While some of that is deeper issues (for a longer post sometime... :-)), some of it is just plain "pray-er's block". Having something concrete to start with gives me such relief, that I don't have to magically have these great words flowing from my heart and mouth and pen!

2) Gives Words to Things I Want To Say But Don't Know How.

One of my favorite prayers, by Richard Foster, begins: "I am, O God, a jumbled mass of motives. One moment I am adoring You, and the next I am shaking my fist at You... I am full of faith and full of doubt. I want the best for others and am jealous when they get it." Uh, yeah I am a jumbled mass of motives... as soon as I read that phrase I identified with it, but I would never have known what to call that feeling of frustration and helplessness I feel with myself sometimes.

"I believe that Jesus Thy Son has plenteous redemption" (from Valley of Vision). Of course I believe He does, but I'd never been able to put it into words quite so succinctly before I read that prayer, and reading that sentence always reminds me of the hugeness of that truth and brings me to gratitude and praise.

3) Creativity and Inspiration.

There are so many times when I'll read a prayer and totally recognize and fall in love with the way they describe God- but I would NEVER have been able to articulate it so well myself, or even have thought about it. My friend Sarah emailed out a prayer reading, "May the blessing of our love and our strong joy in blessing call out new growth in everyone we know and meet". What a cool thing to pray, to ask God to use us to "call out new growth" in others... but I would never have thought about it myself. That same prayer from Valley of Vision thanks God that "Thou hast seen and abhorred all my sins yet... Thou hast invited me to Thy table". I LOVE that image- God inviting us to sit, relax, eat, be with Him at His table- the picture of relationship. Ever since I read that it's been a new visual in my head when I think about the forgiveness and closeness God offers us.

4) Words To Lean On.

Our feelings so often do not line up with what we know to be true. At least mine don't. Prayer books and hymns give me truths to pray, sing, and repeat when my emotions are all over the place and when God feels far away.

"I will not run from Your presence. Nor will I pretend to be what I am not. Thank You for accepting me with all my contradictions. Amen."

"Lord, You have always provided bread for the coming day, and though I am poor, today I believe."

"Hast Thou not bid me seek Thy face, then shall I seek in vain?"

"Come ye sinners, poor and needy, weak and wounded, sick and sore..."

I don't have to wait for my emotions to chill out to pray and I don't have to feel a truth for it to be true. Still, at times when my mind goes blank and my heart doesn't have anything to say, these words have given me a template to talk to God and reminded me of what is true, not contingent on my moods or circumstances.

There are a ton more reasons that I love and am so grateful for pre-written prayers and liturgy... what I learn about God, the calmness of a routine, the way something sinks deeper into your soul when you say it repeatedly, how something mentioned in a prayer book can act as a springboard in my journaling and "casual" conversations with God, the beauty of praying something Christians have prayed for centuries, the connection I feel praying the same prayer as a friend in the same room or continents away.

So yep, using prayer books works for me! For more Works for Me Wednesday please visit We Are THAT Family.

(I love:

Celtic Daily Prayer, from the Northumbria Community

Valley of Vision, a collection of Puritan prayers

Indelible Grace

and my roommate swears by the Book of Common Prayer)

I'd love suggestions for more!

Works For Me Wednesday: Actively Pursuing People

For a long time now, I've enjoyed reading Blogworld's "Works For Me Wednesday" entries. The idea is that "on Wednesday you post a little tip you've learned on anything that has 'worked for you' in making your life easier".

I often apologize at the beginning of voicemails, "Sorry I'm stalking you, but...". It's true. I affectionately stalk people. If I want to get to know you, you might as well just pencil me into your will now, because I have no intention of going away!

While I do tryyy to not be TOO socially inept about it (with successes and failures :-)), I have been way too blessed by being surrounded by incredibly inspiring, fun people, to not take advantage of the opportunities to know and learn from them. It's definitely made my life not just easier, but better, richer, fuller, and sweeter.

The examples of the people from home who have been the victi- I mean, subjects of this aspect of my personality are too numerous to name, so I'll stick to friends at school (or skip down to the "Seriously" part...)

Example #1: My Roommate

I had a nice chat with this sweet blonde girl from Alabama during Orientation Week freshman year. We didn't have any classes together, but we would pass each other on campus every once and a while and say hi by name... and basically I just always thought, "Oh, that Heather girl seems so cool, I wish I had an excuse to get to know her!!"

Then in November... Now, I remember it as that we were walking in the same direction and walked together for a few minutes and THEN I asked if she wanted to make plans to talk more over coffee. The way she tells it, I practically tackled her on the quad and extended the invitation without any small talk. Whatevs. The point is, we went out for coffee on the basis of about 8 minutes of previous interactions.

And it was GREAT. I loved talking with her, I loved her sense of humor and obvious heart for God. Sweet. Want to get together to watch a movie? Awesome!

The next time we hung out somehow resulted in planning a marathon of all the Anne of Green Gables movies. Soon after that, we left for Christmas break, and I carefully planned my Facebook wall posts to show that I would JUST LOVE to hang out more the next semester.

I asked her what else I did to "stalk" her... "Well, you just sort of ended up sleeping in our room all the time..."

Yep. And after two years of living together and enjoying one of the deepest and most encouraging friendships I've ever had, I have to say that pursuing that beautiful girl worked for me!

Then there's Dr. Barwegen, who Tamara and I asked for coffee repeatedly and finally after praying a lot asked to meet with us regularly to mentor us. We've driven an hour to her house in order to hang out with her and met her at 8 in the morning to pray, just because she's so wise and GREAT! I've learned so much, and am continually encouraged (and also have an automatic letter-of-rec writer!)

And there's Breanne (if you know her and me and our friendship you will probably laugh now...). From everything I'd heard about her from our mutual friends, I knew she had a heart of gold, was passionate about compassion and justice, and basically was really cool. She has outright told me she had NO idea she would ever like the hyper, "nice Christian girl" who kept hanging around her and informing her we were going to be friends (my awkwardness, btw, is not part of the "Works for Me", it's just an extra bonus...). But I just knew I could learn so much from her, and I wanted to know her for real. Finally, we were at a sleepover where we got to sit down and have a real conversation. A year later, I am blessed to count her as one of my most real and enjoyed friends, and I think we've learned a ton from each other.

Seriously...

It can be so scary to pursue new friendships and relationships. But so often at Wheaton I hear the coolest, smartest people saying things along the lines of "Well, I'd love to talk more with so-and-so, but they probably wouldn't want to/don't have time/would think I was weird...". Usually the people who are saying this are those people who are SO fun, SO kind, and EVERYONE wants to get to know!

With friendship, why not take the first step? Ask someone for coffee (my MO :-)) or to a meal (I freely admit this is way easier if you are a college student). Write someone a note just saying you've been encouraged by the way you've seen them treat people, and you hope you get to know them better! You'll at least brighten their day, and who knows if you'll hit it off and find a great friend?

And with mentors (I am PASSIONATE about this one), we so often wait for people to offer to mentor us. Now, I'm lucky- I grew up in a church with a FANTASTIC discipleship program and am now at a school which is pretty much obsessed with mentoring- I know it's not that easy for everyone. Still, I know that life just gets busier as we grow older and often it's harder for people to take that initiative than we think. I've found that if I take that first step and try and make it convenient for them (offering to babysit, stopping by during office hours), I've been able to get to know and learn from lots of people I admire. As a high school Bible study leader, I sometimes feel bad about it, but the truth is, the students who pursue me are the ones I end up spending the most time and knowing the best.

Stalking cool people... it works for me!

For more Works For Me Wednesday, visit Rocks In My Dryer.