Home...

I am in Maryland!!!

It is lovely, lovely, lovely to be here.

I am thoroughly enjoying hot showers, a comfortable bed (in a blessedly mice-free bedroom), some variety of food, winter weather, and traffic that stops at red lights.

Way more than any of that though, I am so loving spending time with these precious family and friends I so missed.

My parents, characteristically, pretty much haven't stopped hugging and kissing me since picking me up at the airport on Monday (love it), I'm back to darting in and out of the Ramsings' kitchen to glean wisdom from Nick and Becky and scoop children out for hot chocolate twice a day (literally), and I've gotten to hold Rex TWICE in three days... I figure if I continue at this rate eventually I'll make up for being on another continent the first four months of his life (I still can't believe my friends are allowed to do crazy things like have babies without me present, I mean really).

And, super fun, some crazy bosom friend who had been JUST SO SORRY she couldn't make it home until next week and she's REALLY GOING TO CALL ME A LOT so we can talk my first week home since it's just SO UNFORTUNATE WE CAN'T SEE EACH OTHER... had been super LYING!!!, and totally showed up on my doorstep Monday night.

And some lunches and walks and visits and phone calls... it's just been so lovely. I really have the best friends and family, um, I believe the word is EVER. (My mother snorted when she heard me tell someone on the phone that I'd been "pretty quiet" since coming back... ??). I feel so warm and fuzzy and overwhelmed with joy and what-the-heck-why-is-my-life-so-filled-with-amazing-people-and-love-ness all the time.

Bolivia front:
Goodbyes were so sad but really really rich and affirming and good.

I have absolutely not begun to process... anything... yet. It has not sunk in that I am not in Bolivia and/or am not returning (that I have plans for).

That (the processing) will probably, aka definitely, be hard when it happens. Which it needs to. And it will.

I did go sit quietly at a coffee shop today with my Bible and journal, and acknowledged to God and myself that I was there and now I'm here. I cried (a little bit) for the first time since the airport. I think all those things were good.

I also journaled in Spanish, which felt good. I was very relieved to discover I hadn't forgotten it all already. 'Cause I've heard, you know, lots of people forget whole languages in three days. No but seriously. I felt real relief. After all these months of thinking bitter angry thoughts at verb conjugation charts, I totally am missing it... a lot.

If I think too much about all these faces I'm not sure what will happen. But I need to. Please feel free to ask me about them. I like it (so much it makes me want to cry with gratitude) when people do.

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'K. More random posts to come.

I will say that if you are thinking about going to another country for six months and then coming back, I really highly recommend coming back at Christmastime. Coming home to snow on the ground and frost in the air and carols playing non-stop and general merriment has, true story, added even more joy to my general atmosphere of life... on top of seeing people I love for the first time in months. I really really love coziness and it makes me think of everything that is beautiful and good about life, which is helpful for transitioning from something like this.

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what else?...

My blog is now playing a lovely Christmas music playlist so please click on over and hear.

I baked pumpkin bread for my mother tonight. From scratch. I'll post the recipe later :-)

I love you all so much friends. I cannot thank you enough for the love and support throughout this year. The adventure continues and I hope we shall all continue together.