No idea when I turned into an old fogey... but despite the hoppin' parties being thrown by two excellent groups of friends, after work I went home, happily curled up under the covers, and read Mary Oliver (thanks, Mayr! Perfect Christmas present) until I noticed that it was 12:05. Uh, Happy New Year! It was pretty perfect, actually. And Emilie came and slept over after her (more exciting) event, so my New Year's Eve was officially lovely and wonderful.
One of my goals for break is to do at least some sort of written processing/reflection on the past semester... for posterity. And because I think it's important. And in order to help me set good goals for the spring.
The lovely HNGR program assigned Summer Goal Writing to us at the end of last semester, and they provided a list of "Questions for Reflection" which helped me ENORMOUSLY. There were a bunch, on everything from family to schoolwork to spiritual life... "How is prayer changing in my life?" "Who does my family need me to be this summer?" "What ushers me into the throne room of God?" "Who knows me, really knows me? Who knows me well enough to know if my soul is in distress, and have I invited them into a relationship deep enough that they can speak honestly into my life?"
One of the absolute best and most important parts of the road trip for all of us, I think, was the morning we all spread out with our journals and that list of questions and thought/wrote for a couple of hours. We didn't even talk about them at the time, but it prompted some amazing discussions for the rest of the trip and definitely was a huge highlight of the summer for me personally, relationally, and spiritually. Those questions and the thoughts, conversations, and prayers they prompted gave me a lot of clarification on things to think and pray about and areas of growth I needed to focus on.
So, I spent most of my quiet time today brainstorming some questions to pray through and ask myself before I go back to school.
Here's what I've got so far (with the help of HNGR and some Celtic Daily Prayer readings):
*What are my biggest fears?
*What are my greatest temptations?
*What do I desire (honestly)?
*What do I desire (godly)?
*What lies do I hear/am tempted to believe?
*What are the struggles, fears, temptations, burdens of the people I love? Am I going the 2nd mile in understanding them and caring for them? How can I do this better?
*In what ways/areas am I inclined to selfishness? Laziness? Bitterness?
*What do I most want to be able to look back on the semester and say?
Anyone have any other ideas?
(Here's one goal Mary Oliver provided me with... to be able to say:
"Are my boots old? Is my coat torn?
Am I no longer young, and still not half-perfect? Let me
keep my mind on what matters,
which is my work,
which is mostly standing still and learning to be
astonished..."
Standing still and learning to be astonished sounds like a good goal.)
2 comments:
em!
i really like the questions. especially the distinction between what you want honestly and godly. see you in a couple weeks!
oh em, you are such a thinker. i like your mary oliver-induced goal.
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