Thursday, October 13, 2011

Preaching to myself.

I forwarded this email a few weeks ago to some friends who are out on HNGR right now; I wrote it midway through my own internship in 2009 and hoped it would encourage them in those oh-so-fun "HNGR September blues". I went back this week and needed to reread it to myself... what was it I was saying again?

In moments of tiredness, when I don't know what to do next and I'm wondering if I'm where I should be, when energy or even joy feel hard to find... let me just be faithful.

"...I’ve had the phrase “live faithfullyrunning through my head for a couple months
and I’ve prayed it often, that I would live this time “faithfully”, whatever that might mean.
I’ve asked God for joy;
but I’ve also been reminded that living faithfully,
often means just doing what I am supposed to be doing at any given moment.
Living faithfully isn’t necessarily waking up with a huge leap of joy in my heart to be in this city the way I have felt at other times; it might be just going to work (preferably on time), trying my best to love the girls, working on my independent study, and playing cards with my host siblings.
Maybe right now I need to be learning how to just fulfill my responsibilities faithfully and as cheerfully as possible, with or without “feeling” how I want to be feeling;
and that THAT is what I am called to
in this time."

 dried hydrangeas and vanilla candles on my bedroom wall.


Ryn said...

my dear. this is beautiful. and so poignant... and encouraging to my life right.

thank you.

Satnam said...

Great Blog, Thanks for sharing.

PHL Airport Taxi

Human Needs Global Resources Covenant, 2009

As fellow travelers on this journey, we commit to this covenant before God. Lord, in Your mercy, hear these our prayers:

When confronted with scarcity, need, and inadequacy, may we be nourished by the Bread of Life and the Cup of Salvation. Abundance overflows from Your table, sustaining all who come in faith. Father, help us.

When monotony blurs our vision and dulls our senses, may we encounter others as Christ did, through intentional presence in daily life, submitting as clay to be formed into vessels filled with the Spirit. Christ, guide us.

When wounded by the fractured condition of Your people, may we be united by Your Lordship in faith, hope, and love; seeing, as through the facets of a diamond, the beautiful spectrum of Your light reflected onto Your holy Church joined in praise. Spirit, empower us.

When all Creation groans, afflicted by injustice and driven to despair, may the promise of redemption root us in the hope of Your Kingdom: "Behold, I am making all things new!"

Holy Trinity, send us now into the world in peace, and grant us strength and courage to love and serve You with gladness and singleness of heart.