Obsessed with my Job. Part One.

Oh hey not posting for like two weeks!

Uuuupdate:

I started working full-time 43 hours after graduating from college. This would have been a bad idea except that...

I love my job. LOVE my job. I. Freaking. Love. My. Job. So much I basically feel like it shouldn't be allowed. I am working for an AWESOME program that works with/for low-income families, as a "Home-Based Teacher". Basically what this means: I am in their "early" program, which is babies from pre-born (prenatal care for pregnant mamas!) through 3 year olds (as opposed to 3-5yos). I have 10 families, each of whom I meet with weekly. I come to their homes and do a pre-school-esque, age-appropriate lesson with the baby or toddler. Think lots of reading (YAY!!!!!), lots of simple, sensory-focused toys and games, lots of puzzles, lots of counting and colors and "Oh wow, this texture is different, huh?!!".

Oh and did I mention... it's all in SPANISH?!!!!
(Friends from Bolivia, you may commence laughing hysterically... now. Yeah, get excited to come back to the States. "Really sucky at Spanish in Bolivia" somehow translates to "Bilingual" here. It's pretty awesome.)

Almost all of my families are Mexican immigrants. I am pretty much in love with all of them (today I told Mary I saw one of my "favorite" moms, and then I realized I've said that about the last three I met with). In addition to working with the baby, we are there to provide social support for whatever the family needs- translating, answering questions, trying to provide some insight into the systems, and maybe most importantly just trying to help connect the family with the awesome resources they already have- within themselves and their surrounding community. We try to point out the parents'/families' own great strengths, focusing on coming alongside them to support them as they raise their kids.

So in the past week, I: went with a mom and her baby and 2 year old to get a library card, set up a doctor appointment (after a valiant effort on the mom's part to find a translator), gave out the number for a speech therapist, found out how someone can apply for a free medical card, held a three-month-old baby with the softest black hair you've ever seen, oohed and aahed as a two year old put wooden blocks into their corresponding properly shaped holes, searched for a Spanish copy of "What to Expect When You're Expecting", discussed healthy marital communication (this is part of my job, but I must say I feel very young and inadequate for some of these conversations... hi, I'm 21, how's your marriage going?), pointed out how great a job a mom did at patiently helping her child work with blocks, talked about how easy and discouraging it is to compare yourself to other moms/people, apologized for how much my Spanish sucks, read Clifford El Perro Rojo (and received a wide-eyed realization that "La Maestra es Emily, como la amiga de Clifford!!"- the teacher is Emily, just like Clifford's friend!!), read Pat the Bunny and got excited over different textures, discussed ways to incorporate vegetables into meals and to find time for family walks, played LOTS of peek-a-boo... and of course... gave and received muchos besitos.

Did I mention I love my job?

I am so privileged to get to be knowing these families, playing with and delighting in these children as they learn, and doing whatever I can to strengthen people who already have more strength than I seriously could ever imagine.

the sweet-scented birk shades my Mary and me.

"...how pleasant thy banks and green valleys below,
where, wild in the woodlands, the primroses blow;
there oft, as mild Ev'ning weeps over the lea,
the sweet-scented birk shades my Mary and me.
thy crystal stream, Afton, how lovely it glides,
and winds by the cot where my Mary resides..."

-from Sweet Afton, originally by Robert Burns (the connection of which I didn't get until just now- hilarious!)
put to excellent music by Nickel Creek
...and sung in the heart of ME!

MY Mary arrives today... sweet bosom friend time for THREE AND A HALF WHOLE DAYS...
Praise. God. From. Whom. All. Blessings. Flow, is all I can say.

When the Roses Speak, I Pay Attention.

"As long as we are able to
be extravagant we will be
hugely and damply
extravagant*. Then we will drop
foil by foil to the ground. This
is our unalterable task, and we do it
joyfully."

And they went on. "Listen,
the heart-shackles are not, as you think,
death, illness, pain,
unrequited hope, not loneliness, but

lassitude, rue, vainglory, fear, anxiety,
selfishness."

Their fragrance all the while rising
from their blind bodies, making me
spin with joy.

-Mary Oliver
Emphasis' sooo mine.

THIS WAS SO TIMELY I cannot even tell you. Oh Lord, write it on my heart...
"the heart-shackles are not, as you think."

*"Freely you have received; freely give..."

something about the Cross and how her Jesus died for her

people who think following God is worth living with pain
and who choose to do so
make God appear so worth loving and following.

seeing people live this decision with joy and gratitude and determination
brings me to tears, amazement, and feeling oh-so-humbled
at my own so-selfish worldview.

maybe "it" (life? Christianity?) is really not about my personal happiness
(she thinks for the 8 millionth time in the last six months, in yet another light).

how far i have to go...
let me follow their examples.
nothing makes it appear more valuable than seeing it lived out in front of me.
how lucky i am for that.

"The next best thing to being wise oneself
is to live in a circle of those who are."
-C.S. Lewis

i will mark which must be mine.

i will be the gladdest thing under the sun
i will touch a hundred flowers and not pick one
i will look at cliffs and clouds with quiet eyes
watch the wind bow down the grass, and the grass rise

and when the lights begin to show up from the town
i will mark which must be mine
and then start down


-originally by edna st. vincent millay
put to excellent music by deb talan

how have i spoken blessing over others today?

"There is a reality in blessing... It doesn't enhance sacredness, but it acknowledges it, and there is a power in that. I have felt it pass through me, so to speak.
The sensation is of really knowing a creature, I mean really feeling its mysterious life and your own mysterious life at the same time."

-Gilead, p 23

Loving it so far. (Thanks for the recommendation SLAGG!). It makes me want to fold down the corner of every page to remember and weep and do great things like love people.

After an hour reading it today sprawled on Ryan and Kendra's couch with rain coming down outside and Kendra puttering around in her office and the cat grooming in the corner life felt so beautiful I couldn't stand it anymore so I had to get up and do something totally unimportant and non-life-giving like check email.

More on blessing and calling out blessings in others here.

streams of mercy.

oh to grace how great a debtor
daily i'm constrained to be
let Thy goodness like a fetter
bind my wandering heart to Thee